After-effects of an Alcoholic Parent: How to Deal?

As a child, like many children, I dealt with an alcoholic, borderline abusive parent. I've come to terms with this as an adult, with relatively few emotional scars. I don't drink at all, and I never have.

My problem is that I don't like it when people close to me drink, and when my boyfriend drinks, I get absolutely crazy. I know he isn't an alcoholic, and he almost never gets 'drunk' (and never has around me), but I see him as a protector, and it terrifies me when he drinks.

I know he loves me, and would stop if I asked him. However, I don't want my mental problems to affect his life; I want to fix my mental problems. We've been together for a while now, and I trust him more than my own kin, so it's not as though he has a short fuse or I'm afraid he's hiding his alcoholism from me.



Has anyone dealt with a similar issue with people they love who was not an alcoholic drinking? How do you deal? Should I try counseling? I'm not sure about Al-anon, since I don't believe drinking is a disease. Any suggestions?After-effects of an Alcoholic Parent: How to Deal?
It sounds like you know the problem.



First, talk things out with your boyfriend. Tell him how you feel, and make it clear that you know his drinking isn't a problem and that you're not asking him to stop, but that you want to work though your issues and you need his help to do it.



One option is Al-Anon, which is an organization that helps family members of alcoholics and recovering alcoholics. They may be able to help you. Another might be to talk to a qualified counselor or psychologist who can help you better understand and address the root causes of your fears. Seeing a psychologist doesn't mean you're ';crazy'; any more than seeing a doctor means you're ';diseased';, it just means you want to talk to an expert who can help you.After-effects of an Alcoholic Parent: How to Deal?
sounds like you already know the problem and the answer, if you are aware of these feelings you have it in you to deal with it
My mother and father were both alcoholics. Talk to him and tell him

how feel about drinking. If he loves you he will quit now. If he does not

then leave him. You have been thru enough already.